Tamilnadu SSLC Results 2009

SSLC Results are the turning point for the students to get into a good school and this is the starting of their career. Because of this only SSLC results are having some importance. TN SSLC results are to be announced tomorrow. Some of the links for the SSLC Results. All the best to all students.

http://tnresults.nic.in/
http://www.kalvimalar.com/
http://www.dinamalar.com/

General Knowledge

1. There is one word in the English language that is always pronounced
incorrectly. What is it?

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2. A man gave one son 10 cents and another son was given 15 cents.
What time is it?

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3. A boat has a ladder that has six rungs, each rung is one foot
apart. The bottom rung is one foot from the water.

The tide rises at 12 inches every 15minutes. High tide peaks in one
hour. When the tide is at it's highest, how many rungs are under
water?

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4. There is a house with four walls. Each wall faces south. There is a
window in each wall. A bear walks by one of the windows. What color is
the bear?

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5. Is half of two plus two equal to two or three?

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6. There is a room. The shutters are blowing in. There is broken glass
on the floor. There is water on the floor. You find Sloppy dead on the
floor. Who is Sloppy? How did Sloppy die?

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7. How much dirt would be in a hole 6 feet deep and 6 feet wide that
has been dug with a square edged shovel?

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8. If I were in Hawaii and dropped a bowling ball in a bucket of water
which is 45 degrees F, and dropped another ball of the same weight,
mass, and size in a bucket at 30 degrees F, both of them at the same
time, which ball would hit the bottom of the bucket first?

Same question, but the location is in Canada ?

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9. What is the significance of the following: The year is 1978,
thirty-four minutes past noon on May 6th.

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10. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the
other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all
in the center field?

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11. What is it that goes up and goes down but does not move?

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1.. The word "incorrectly. "

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2. 1:45. The man gave away a total of 25 cents. He divided it between
two people. Therefore, he gave a quarter to two.

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3. None, the boat rises with the tide. Googly ;-)

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4. White. If all the walls face south, the house is at the North pole,
and the bear, therefore, is a polar bear.

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5. Three. Well, it seems that it could almost be either, but if you
follow the mathematical orders of operation, division is performed
before addition.

So... half of two is one. Then add two, and the answer is three.

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6. Sloppy is a (gold)fish. The wind blew the shutters in, which
knocked his goldfish-bowl off the table, and it broke, killing him.

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7. None. No matter how big a hole is, it's still a hole: the absence of dirt.

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8. Both questions, same answer: the ball in the bucket of 45 degree F
water hits the bottom of the bucket last. Did you think that the water
in the 30 degree F bucket is frozen? Think again.

The question said nothing about that bucket having anything in it.
Therefore, there is no water (or ice) to slow the ball down...

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9. The time and month/date/year American style calendar are 12:34, 5/6/78.

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10. One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.

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11. The temperature.

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ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can
spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him
a little

Oh! Baby, you're amazing!

Oh! Baby, you're amazing!

The human baby is truly amazing;
the unfolding of his qualities and abilities a complex story.
His tiny body has the backing of a million years
of human evolution,
helping different features to develop
in a special sequence.

Evolution has armed the infant with
an irresistible appeal that ensures his parents care for him,
feed him, and keep him clean and warm.

For human beings,
the parental burden is huge,
lasting nearly two decades for each child,
but it can also be a source of intense joy.
And
babies are our only certain form of immortality,
ensuring that our genes do not die out.

But the importance of a baby's first two years
cannot be overestimated.
Many of the qualities he acquires in that
time mark him for life.
Nestling inside his fragile head,
a newborn baby has the genetically inherited
equipment that is needed for this development.

All his parents have to do is offer him the setting in which
this equipment can whirr into action.

Read on for amazing facts
about a baby's potential…

1 BIRTH

When a newborn baby is placed on his mother's stomach
so that she can embrace him, it is no accident
that the umbilical cord is of just the right length
- approximately 20 inches -
to make this possible
while the baby is still attached to the placenta.

2 THE BABY'S HEAD

The bony plates of a baby's skull remain separate after birth.
Small gaps between them are covered by a tough,
membranous tissue that is strong enough
to resist all but a sharp, direct blow.
The plates eventually touch,
forming wavy sutures which become harder
and stronger until the skull is fused;
in most cases, this takes between 18 and 24 months.

3 BODY TEMPERATURE

A full-term newborn has a secret weapon
- "brown" fat.
This special type of fatty tissue,
which burns calories, makes up five per cent of
the baby's body and is located in the back,
shoulders and neck.
It liberates heat through a special chemical process
if the baby's body starts to cool unduly.

4 REFLEXES

If a parent presses their forefingers into the palms
of a newborn baby's hands, his tiny fingers respond
by curling tightly and clinging on.
Amazingly,
if the parent then gently lifts
the clasped forefingers,
the baby's grasp is usually so strong that his whole body
can hang in mid-air,
with his bent fingers supporting his weight.

5 HEARTBEAT

The resting heart rate for an infant
(115 pulses per minute)
is about the same as that of an adult
who has been performing strenuous exercise.

6 BONDING

A baby can identify his mother by her unique body
fragrance and a blindfolded woman has the ability
to identify her child from a host of other babies by scent alone.
A sleeping mother can identify the cry of her baby, too.
She is programmed to wake only
at the sound of her particular infant.

7 BABY FACE

Adults respond to particular features
- found in their most exaggerated form on a baby's face.
These include a large forehead, a button nose, big eyes,
fine hair and a small chin.
When an adult sees an unfamiliar baby face,
so powerful is the instinct that the brain reacts
within one-seventh of a second.

8 BIRTH WEIGHT

The average weight of a baby at birth is 7-8lb,
but the smallest baby ever to survive
(a premature one) weighed only 8.5oz at birth.
The heaviest weighed in at 22lb.

9 SKELETON

The exact number of infant bones varies
but there are usually about 270 at birth compared to an adult,
who has 206.
The reductions take place in the central skeleton,
owing to the fusing together of bones in the spine and skull.
A baby is born without ossified kneecaps
- these do not develop until he is two years old.

10 SLEEP

During his first week outside the womb,
a typical baby sleeps for 16.6 hours out of every 24
in as many as 18 separate naps.
By the age of six months,
his total sleep time is 14 hours,
and by the age of five,
it is down to 12 hours per day.

11 LEFT AND RIGHT

One in 10 children is left-handed;
from studies of ancient axe handles,
we know this bias has existed for at least 200,000 years.
A clue may lie in the fact that the majority
of babies lie in the womb with their right sides
closer to their mother's body surface,
therefore it receives more stimulation during pregnancy.

12 TOUCH

Girls are more sensitive to touch than boys
- on average, girls just a few hours old react
to a weak puff of air against their belly and
squirm and cry more than boys when uncovered.
Other investigators have found that plenty of
skin contact produces babies
who cry less and are healthier.

13 INTELLIGENCE

The brain of a child
is much busier than that of an adult.
In the brain of a newborn, there are about 2,500 synapses
(connections between brain cells)
attached to each of the 10 billion neurons
or brain cells he possesses.
In a two-year-old, this number rises to 15,000
- more than in the brain of adults,
who lose some of these connections over time,
as the ones that are used less are eventually eliminated.

14 SELF-AWARENESS

When a toddler reaches the age of 15 months,
a moment of truth arrives.
He looks in the mirror, waves his hand,
and the "other person"
waves back in exactly the same way.
The child realises that what he sees is himself
and not another child.
Apart from human toddlers,
only chimpanzees, orang-utans, dolphins,
elephants and just one gorilla
have managed this with any certainty.

15 GENDER AND BRAIN

Even at the 26th week of pregnancy,
it is possible to distinguish a male foetal brain
from a female one.
Male babies have brains
that are more asymmetrical than female babies.
They also have more white matter and less grey matter.
In female brains there is more symmetry
in the "higher association cortex";
the part of the brain that deals with
complex mental processes.

Newton in Romantic Mood......

Newton in Romantic Mood......

Universal law of Love:
" Love can neither be created nor be destroyed; only it can transfer
from One girlfriend to another girlfriend with some loss of money "

First law of Love:
" a boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a
girl in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, until or
unless any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into
play and break the legs of the boy. "

Second law of Love:
" the rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is
directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and
the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the
bank balance. "

Third law of Love:
" the force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and
opposite to the force applied by the girl while slapping."

Worlds Smallest Man meet Longest Legs Women

Worlds Smallest Man meet Longest Legs Women

He Pingping from Inner Mongolia, China's autonomous region, the
world's smallest man sits underneath Svetlana Pankratova from Russia,
the Queen of Longest Legs, as they pose at Trafalgar Square in London,
Tuesday, Sept. 16, 2008. Pingping, born with primordial dwarfism,
holds the Guinness World Record for the smallest man at 74.61 cms (2
feet and 5.37 inches) and Pankratova holds the Guinness World Record
for the longest leg of any woman at 132 cms (4 feet 4 inches) in
length.

Meaning of M.P

Meaning of M.P

OFFICER : WHAT IS YOUR NAME ?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : TELL ME PROPERLY

CANDIDATE : MOHAN PAL SIR

OFFICER : YOUR FATHER'S NAME ?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : WHAT DOSE THAT MEAN ?

CANDIDATE : MANMOHAN PAL SIR

OFFICER : YOUR NATIVE PLACE

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : IS IT MADHYA PRADESH ?

CANDIDATE : NO, MUNNUR PAL SIR

OFFICER : WHAT IS YOUR QUALIFICATION ?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : (ANGRILY) WHAT IS IT ?

CANDIDATE : METRIC PASS

OFFICER : WHY DO YOU NEED A JOB ?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : AND WHAT DOSE THAT MEAN?

CANDIDATE : MONEY PROBLEM SIR

OFFICER : DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : EXPLAIN YOURSELF CLEARLY

CANDIDATE : MAGNANIM OUS PERSONALITY SIR

OFFICER : THIS DISCUSSION IS NOWHERE, YOU MAY GO NOW

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : WHAT IS IT NOW

CANDIDATE MY PERFORMANCE. ...?

OFFICER : M P!!!!

CANDIDATE : WHAT IS THAT SIR?

OFFICER : MENTALLY PUNCTURED