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Thanks and Regards,

Santhakumar

Beer Vs Women

Most men like women. But, most men like beer too! So, for men it
becomes a rather confusing choice between women and beer!

A Beer is always wet, a woman is not !
1 point for beer !

Beer is horrible, when it is hot !
1 point for women !

A cold beer, satisfies you !
1 point for beer !

If you come back home smelling beer, your wife can get angry at you.
If you come back home smelling women, your wife will get angry for
sure and she might even not talk to you again !
Draw ! ( Depends on your point of view .... )

10 beers in a night and then you can't drive.
10 women in one night and you don't have to drive anywhere !
1 point for women !

The older, The beer is - the better, it is !
1 point for beer !

If you ask yourself how the next woman will be, you are normal.
If you ask yourself how the next beer will be, you are an alcoholic !
1 point for women !

For a beer, you pay taxes !
1 point for women !

If you take a second beer, the first one doesn't get angry !
1 point for beer !

You can always be sure that, you are the first one " Opening " a beer !
1 point for beer !

If you shake a beer, after a while it calms down by itself !
1 point for beer !

You know exactly how much a beer costs !
1 point for beer !

A beer does not have a mother !
1 point for beer !

You can do it if you want, but beer won't ask you to hug her for half
an hour after !
1 point for beer !

So the Score is ......... Beer beats women - 9 to 6 !

If you are a woman reading this and getting angry ....... know that a
beer would never get angry!
So .......... Another point for beer !

Now the final score is .......... Beer beats women - 10 to 6 !

Ten Principles for Peace of Mind

1. Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked.

Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others'
affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our
way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do
not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the
right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of
individuality and consequently the existence of God.. God has each one
of us in a way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the
same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within them
prompts them that way. Mind your own business and you will keep your
peace.

2. Forgive And Forget.

This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill
feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us.
We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep,
development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or
injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by
constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short
to waste in such trifles. Forgive, Forget, and march on. Love
flourishes in giving and forgiving.

3. Do Not Crave For Recognition.

This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody
without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in
power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your
achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to
kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is
not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely.

4. Do Not Be Jealous.

We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind.
You know that you harder than your colleagues in the office, but
sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You a business several
years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose
business is only one old. There are several examples like these in
everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody's life is
shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. If
you are destined to be rich, nothing in the world can stop you. If you
are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be
gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get
you anywhere; it will only take away your peace of mind.

5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.

If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are
you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As
you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you,
will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.

6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured.

This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every
day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and
accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or
change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn
to endure them cheerfully. Believe in yourself and you will gain in
terms of patience, inner strength and will power.

7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.

This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take
more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is
done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. . Why take on
additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace
of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material
engagements and spend in prayer, introspection and meditation. This
will reduce those thoughts in your mind that you restless. Uncluttered
mind will produce greater peace of mind.

8. Meditate Regularly.

Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is
the highest state of peace of mind. Try and it yourself. If you
meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to
become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your
mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit
by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think
that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this
will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better
results in less time

9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.

An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the
vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something
worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your
interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind.
Your hobby, like social work or religious work, may not always earn
you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and
achievement. Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in
healthy reading or mental chanting of God's name.

10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret.

Do not waste time in protracted wondering " Should I or shouldn't I?"
Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental
debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate
all future happenings. Value your time and do the things that need to
be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn
from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and
worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not
brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to
happen only that way. Why cry over spilt milk?

short joke

Religious Husband

A HUSBAND COMES HOME FROM CHURCH;

HE GREETS HIS WIFE AND LIFTS HER UP. HE THEN CARRIED HER AROUND THE HOUSE.

THE WIFE WAS SO SURPRISED AND SHE ASKED
'DID THE BISHOP PREACH ABOUT BEING ROMANTIC'?

THE HUSBAND SAID, 'NO, HE SAID WE MUST CARRY OUR BURDENS AND SORROWS'.

TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought
he was God and I didn't.

2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal! To kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

10.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck- is-the-room- spinning medicine.

12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

18 . Procrastinate Now!

19.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?

20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

24.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three
thousand times the memory.

26.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

27.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

28.. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

29.. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

The Wood Cutter

The Wood Cutter

One day a woodcutter took his grandson into the forest for his first
experience in selecting and cutting oak trees. These they would later
sell to the boat builders.

As they walked along, the woodcutter explained that the purpose of
each tree is contained in its natural shape: some are straight for
planks, some have the proper curves for the ribs of a boat, and some
are tall for masts.

The woodcutter told his grandson that by paying attention to the
details of each tree, and with experience in recognizing these
characteristics, someday he too might become the woodcutter of the
forest.

A little way into the forest, the grandson saw an old oak tree that
had never been cut. The boy asked his grandfather if he could cut it
down because it was useless for boat building - there were no straight
limbs, the trunk was, short and gnarled, and the curves were going the
wrong way. "We could cut it down for firewood," the grandson said. "At
least then it will be of some use to us." The woodcutter replied that
for now they should be about their work cutting the proper trees for
the boat builders; maybe later they could return to the old oak tree.

After a few hours of cutting the huge trees, the grandson grew tired
and asked if they could stop for a rest in some cool shade. The
woodcutter took his grandson over to the old oak tree, where they
rested against its trunk in the cool shade beneath its twisted limbs.

After they had rested a while, the woodcutter explained to his
grandson the necessity of attentive awareness and recognition of
everything in the forest and in the world. Some things are readily
apparent, like the tall, straight trees; other things are less
apparent, requiring closer attention, like recognition of the proper
curves in the limbs. And some things might initially appear to have no
purpose at all, like the gnarled old oak tree.

The woodcutter stated, "You must learn to pay careful attention every
day so you can recognize and discover the purpose God has for
everything in creation. For it is this old oak tree, which you so
quickly deemed useless except for firewood, that now allows us to rest
against its trunk amidst the coolness of its shade.

"Remember, grandson, not everything is as it first appears. Be
patient, pay attention, recognize, and discover."

How smart is your right foot - amazing

HOW SMART IS YOUR RIGHT FOOT ?

This is hysterical.I guess there are some things that the brain cannot handle..

HOW SMART IS YOUR RIGHT FOOT ?

You have to try this please, it takes 2 seconds. I could not believe
this! This will confuse your mind and will keep you trying over and
over again to see if you can outsmart your foot, but you can't. It is
pre-programmed in your brain!

1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and
make clockwise circles.

2. Now, while doing this, draw the number '6' in the air with your
right hand. Your foot will change direction.

And there's nothing you can do about it! You and I both know how
stupid it is, but before the day is done you are going to try it
again, if you've not already done so.